Monday, December 5, 2011

Running from the Monster

When I was young, I spent many of my summer weeks at my grandmothers house.  There were many things I like about her staying with her.  A creek split at the top of her property and surrounded her house that my grandfather built.  There were fish to be caught, trees to climb, cherries to eat and most importantly someone who really loved me.  It was an acre of paradise.

Another great thing about spending my days there was the fact that two of my uncles had homes on adjoining properties.  So not only did I get to spend time with my grandmother, but my cousins were close at hand.  Those growing up years were filled with many fun filled memories.

One memory that I had wasn't pleasant though.  Sometimes I would be at my cousins' house until after it was dark.  That meant when it was time to go back to my grandma's house, I had to go down a dark driveway.  This wasn't just a short driveway, but more of a dirt road that connected their houses.  It was a long walk down that road.  But usually it wasn't a walk, it was a run for my life.  I would pause at the top of the drive, screw up my courage and then run like crazy.  I ran past the trees, the duck pen and the unseen monsters that lurked waiting to grab me.  I raced as fast as I could go and then make a sharp left, head for the porch and burst through the door out of breathe and grateful that I made it home alive.  I'm sure my grandmother knew why I was a little wild-eyed and breathing hard but she loved me enough not to say anything.

I don't think I realized at the time that there was a monster.  But it wasn't in the trees or the duck pen.  The monster was inside of me.  I had created it and hid it along the drive.  I couldn't outrun the monster because it was running right along inside of me.

I think we all have a monster or two inside of us that keeps us from doing what we would like.  They freeze us into inaction or get us running off in the wrong direction.  They cause us to place the blame somewhere outside of us.

I had one of those monsters that was keeping me for living a more healthy life.  It was making me believe that it was to late for me to make a change and lose some weight.  I'm glad that I had something give me hope that that mosnter wasn't real.  I could make a change, I could be fit again, I could lose weight.

I've still got some monsters that I need to quite believing in and quit avoiding the fact that I am that I am the one I am running from.  One of them is this last thirty to thirty-five more pounds I need to lose.  Why am I not willing to quit running from it?  What's it going to take for me to get rid of this monster?  I hope I can face this monster soon and get it out of my life!

You got any monsters you need to get rid of?

Hang in there and I will too!


  1. The monster for me - if I lose all of this weight how will I be? Trying to scare away that too comfortable big how I am now monster so I can find a vibraint thinner fairy princess!!


  2. My monster is baking in my oven as we speak!

    Loved this post! I keep thinking the same thing. I've got 15-20 still, and keep putting it off. So many excuses - all monsters!

  3. Thanks bruce for a "great read" today. My monster is chocolate covered I'm afraid and I'm realizing just how bad my addiction is. I am only 10-15 lbs. from my goal, but just have no motivation to do a whole lot about it. For some reason I sabbotage myself with things I know I shouldn't eat and think it won't affect my weight or really matter if I eat it. My mind tells me I need to eat something sweet and it won't stop until I do. Definately a monster within. Maybe 2012 is our year! Love ya Bro!

  4. Love the post Dad. It really got me thinking about my own struggles with self-sabotage. I sometimes wonder if we wait for a reason or motivation to finally conquer our monsters. With Ethan being born, I feel a renewed sense of drive and ambition to get (and stay) in shape. However, sometimes these monsters are pernicious and tricky and can work their magic nevertheless. I believe that the motivation must come from within; from the same place that the monster was created. I hate to make a Lord of the Rings reference here, but like the One Ring of Power, the monster can only be destroyed by the fires that forged it. This is one of the reasons why I love running as an activity so much. Usually, the person you're competing with is yourself. It is often the best way to come face to face with that monster and challenge it. Thanks for the inspiration!

  5. I still think my monsters are fat, salt and sugar. Love them all although I am slowly learning a little bit will do me just fine. I know, too, that what I am eating now, is basically what I will be eating most of my life if I really want to be healthy. It is not a DIE-IT, it is a live it for me.

  6. Nice story, Bruce. I think I have the same monsters. Better start running from them...literally!

    (If you care about such things, this post had a lot of words run together in Google Reader - likethisforexample. I don't know why, but once that happened to me when I wrote on Word and cut and pasted to Google Reader. No big deal though!)

  7. I think I have at least 7 and 8 on the way! I often find myself using my being busy as an excuse to eat quick and easy foods. If I really wanted to I could do just 5 or 10 minutes longer and make something healthier for me. I have gotten better, but there is always room for improvement. Thanks for a great analogy of the things we run from. You can do it. I love you and keep up the good work.